A Feeling Of Uncertainty (2)
07.10.07
Posted under: Life
Sometimes, like now, I don’t know where I’m going. I don’t know what I have to look forward to, I don’t know what is going to happen to me. As a Libra, that is hard to handle and to grasp. I can’t stand not knowing what my future holds for me. Who am I going to meet? Am I going to meet the right people? Will he ever come? Will I be alone? Will I just end up settling? Can I get the ideal? Will I find the ideal?
It’s just all so… difficult to process. When one future ends, how do you begin the new one? When what you thought was going to happen doesn’t, then where do you start? How do you know what you truly want? Do you want a warm body regardless of who it is? Do you want the warm body? What if what you thought you wanted isn’t what you want? Or perhaps what you want is something that you can no longer have and so now, you have to change those wants? What if you don’t want to change those wants? Should you change them? What if you change them only to find out that it was the wrong decision?
Coming from a family who was always driven to not make mistakes, I don’t want to make one now, but everywhere I turn, I can see mistakes happening. If I go one way, then my mistake would be to lose something great. If I turn another way, my mistake would be to miss something great. Either way, I can see a loss and I don’t want to make either decision until I know for certain that I can’t make any mistakes.
But this is life and no matter what, there are always going to be mistakes and from that, I have to learn how to be able to work from those, right? But, like I said, I don’t want to make any whatsoever. I want to be able to take from others’ mistakes and apply them to my life so I don’t have to do the same thing. But how do you know which one to learn from?
It’s just all so confusing and as each day goes by, everything seems to get fuzzier.
If everything is fuzzy, then how can I see the beginning?
Popularity: 16% [?]
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Tags: confusion, decisions, future, fuzziness, ideals, Life, loss, love, mistakes, paths, present, roads, uncertainty
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Mari remarked:
Monday, October 8, 2007 @ 2:40 pm GMT-8
The only way to avoid feeling lost after the glass floor of your idea of the future breaks and you fall through the floor…is to never have had a clue in the first place. Feel good that you had an idea, Maria.
That’s something everyone has to accept in their own way. As much as we plan and try to know what the future holds, we don’t. We don’t know if we’re going to have grandkids or die at 20.
You can either charge at the new future with your entire being, or let it come at you. Only an older, wiser person knows what they truly wanted when they were young. But by then, they’re older and wiser, so it doesn’t matter.
If the one you thought you wanted wasn’t all that great…it shows you’ve grown, and that’s always good. Realizing that you tricked yourself into wanting that person is the only part of tricking yourself that you can control.
Being indecisive could be the biggest mistake ever. Sometimes that fork in the river rapids comes at you too fast, but if you don’t decide for yourself, the river might decide for you. And when that happens, it’s even harder to think why you didn’t just make the decision.
You will make mistakes. You will slip and fall, but you have to get back up and adjust your plan. You need to accept that as hard as you try, you’re still going to make mistakes. That doesn’t mean to set your standards lower. Just be a little easier on yourself.
Sometimes you can learn from the mistakes of others, but sometimes you have to make the mistake yourself. It depends on what mistake it was, and what person you are.
Change and the passage of time are the only constants in this universe.
ali voiced:
Wednesday, October 10, 2007 @ 1:01 pm GMT-8
Hi *i came to your site following link exchanges links out of boredom*
I’m sorry you feel this way. I’m saying this so i won’t sound like too much of a jerk saying that i feel a bit relieved someone else feels this way.here I am 1yr after graduating uni & I still have no idea what to do with the rest of my life. To sum it up, it’s feels like stagnant water. What do you do when you life doesn’t go according to the way you had envisioned it to for so long?
I think along with learning from mistakes, its also a matter of faith a bit? maybe the path has already been chosen for us, we just need the clarity to follow it with assurance. A branch will either bend in the wind or break, and all those other such adages. Hm now i’m rambling….
anyways. take care & be blessed