Rules Of Love (14)
12.08.07
Posted under: Relationships
It’s so easy for someone to make rules that s/he wants to follow, but when that one special person comes along, all the rules get bent and broken.
So then, what’s the point of making the rules? Are the rules there to weed out the bad ones? Or because we feel that all the other relationships have been so bad that having rules makes it “safe” again.
But see, the rules get broken. Especially when someone comes along and takes your heart away, the rules get trampled on. It doesn’t always mean in a good way either. (I just want to believe it’s in the good way because I’m such a hopeless romantic.) The point is that we are so apt to make these guide lines that we believe future significant others need to follow, yet we always find a way to bend them to fit, to break them to mold.
My question is then, what’s the point? Why go through all that hassle? Or maybe, you use the rules as a measurement of how much you’re willing to change and to sacrifice for this one person.
Popularity: 8% [?]
Tags: dating, love, relationship, rules
14 Comments »
Leave a comment
Want to get your own gravatar? Head here
If your comment is irrelevant, it will be deleted.
Please read the commenting policies.
RSS Feed
Stockton Boy wrote:
Sunday, August 12, 2007 @ 2:09 pm GMT-8
I don’t really think that it is a rule for relationships as much as it is a rule for yourself. For instance if someone knows or has an idea of what they want and don’t want, the best thing for themselves is to not be around those things that impede their wishes. It also depends on how devout to their wishes as to what they would ask from another. Sort of like those you are either with me or with out me things.
Mari expressed:
Sunday, August 12, 2007 @ 4:39 pm GMT-8
Stockton Boy got it.
They’re rules for ourselves. We get hurt, and we decide to try to defend ourselves from getting hurt again, but we can’t stop the attraction when we find a special one, and we break the rules.
Becca said:
Monday, August 13, 2007 @ 10:13 am GMT-8
I think those rules are walls we put up around our hearts. In my case anyways. I had rules, till I met the guy I’m with now. I let most the rules go out the window (not all because of religion) because I love him and he deserves to know things, because I trust him and allow him to get close.
The other boys couldn’t take down the walls because they were just boys…they didn’t know anything. lol.
Tiffany said:
Monday, August 13, 2007 @ 2:30 pm GMT-8
I think it’s important to make guidelines, not “rules”. Without guidlines, it would be like dating in a man’s confined sense of mind. I don’t know what exactly entails, but it means that as a guy you’re not that hurt and effected by your relationships.
Stockton Boy remarked:
Monday, August 13, 2007 @ 6:05 pm GMT-8
I will disagree with Tiffany. Just because a man doesn’t cry, doesn’t post his personal feeling on a internet blog, doesn’t talk about it, doesn’t mean that we are not that hurt and effected. I actually think that guys will be more hurt then women. We may not cry and piss and moan about it. But our insides will be torn asunder. We get hurt, maybe not as often, but when there is something to hurt us, it can cause quite some emotional damage. And just because some of us will “move on” really quick don’t think that he has really moved on. A buddy of mine for example loves this girl that he was with two years ago. He really loves her now. Long story of hurt and betrayal on both parts. And even though he found a new girl a month or so after that was not because he moved on and no longer cares about her (he wants nothing more then to be with her), but more because he needed someone to hold and to feel special. He doesn’t cry about it to all of his friends or tells the entire internet world, but I can see in his eyes that he is still hurt by that girl.
I think that it is very wrong to say that guys aren’t as affected as girls. Imagine the kind of angry responses I would get from you ladies if I were to say something like “Women cry too much” or “Stop pissing and moaning about nothing”.
Kristin remarked:
Wednesday, August 15, 2007 @ 10:04 am GMT-8
I know rules are important, but I really don’t like them much. I think that rules are made to be broken.
Jenn commented:
Wednesday, August 15, 2007 @ 10:27 am GMT-8
Honestly, I try not to think about all of that too much. I used to, and it just confused me and upset me.
Now I just go with the flow of things and let what happens, happen.
Julie shouted:
Wednesday, August 15, 2007 @ 7:30 pm GMT-8
You’ve got a good question there. I think we do make rules to avoid bad people, but we break them when someone proves to be trustworthy and the rules seem unnecessary. If that makes sense.
Tiffany answered:
Thursday, August 16, 2007 @ 6:47 pm GMT-8
Gosh, I would I could answer that. I don’t think I’ve made rules in the past though. Well, not relationship-wise. I’ve made rules for myself (like no kissing if I’m not dating the person, etc. lol) but I used to break them because I had a hard time saying “no”
Mari stated:
Thursday, August 16, 2007 @ 10:13 pm GMT-8
Mari agrees with Stockton Boy’s second comment. Men do really get hurt in relationships too. Mari’s mother says things to Mari’s father…and just because he doesn’t cry about it doesn’t mean that didn’t hurt him. He’ll still be thinking about it days later, and maybe let his thoughts slip out to one of his kids while having a smoke.
It’s easy to deal with emotions if you always let them out like most of us women do. It’s perplexed Mari as to what the hell men do with their emotions ever since Mari realised they have them.
Musme stated:
Saturday, August 18, 2007 @ 8:30 pm GMT-8
I made up this rule and made a promise that for four years (last two high school years & first two college years) I wasn’t going to date any guys. So far so good. I’m not sure if you mean that. If I make up rules during a relationship, I think I’d follow them. I very anal and just … weird I guess. LOL … Did I misunderstand your question? Somehow I feel like I did hahahah
Mallory replied:
Monday, August 20, 2007 @ 5:25 am GMT-8
I think rules in relationships are more like guidelines: you can use them to see who this person really is and how they treat you. If they break certain rules (like hitting you or treating you like dirt) then they’re not worth anything at all. But if they break little rules and you love them a lot, it doesn’t really matter. ^^
Chiem shouted:
Tuesday, August 21, 2007 @ 8:38 pm GMT-8
First, I want to thank you for your comment on my entry about my grandmother. Yeah, I even think about that, but she wants to live, and my relatives don’t want her to go even though her bad characters are shown up more and more.
I personally think there should be some rules in a relationship, like rule of sex and rule of honesty. That would make the relationship last longer.
BTW, your top image is so nice. It’s so adorable!
Rilla announced:
Tuesday, August 21, 2007 @ 11:53 pm GMT-8
I’m not too sure what rules you’re talking about exactly, but well, I do try to set myself a “limit” to liking someone, to avoid getting hurt perhaps. In the end though, I usually find I’ve liked him more than I knew myself. This limit doesn’t work out…
But if you mean… Say, “standards” we actually set for our other half, e.g. must be intelligent, tall, sporty etc etc. They get overridden far too easily for me. And I perceive that as a bad thing.