One of these days, I’ll have a purpose for this blog.
Of course, it will have more of a purpose as soon as I pay my hosting bill… which is as soon as I get paid…
Life is… well, life. I’ve had my ups and downs throughout this year and I’ve just started something new with someone I think is very special, kind, exciting, and definitely has potential to motivate me to better myself more than I try to already. I will admit that I am very scared because in terms of my feelings, there are similarities to how I felt when I first started with Stockton Boy. Yes, the situations are different, but I honestly haven’t felt this way about anyone since him, so yes, I’m quite scared.
However, the difference is this time, I’m definitely trying to communicate more about my issues and if I have fears about anything. I don’t want to end up surprising this new boy with anything and I want him to know how I feel as often as possible. I just really hope I don’t get hurt again.
I’ve already started my last undergraduate year in school. I’m trying to finish up my B.A. in Social Welfare. What I’ll do after college, I’m not sure yet. I know that I definitely want to go into the non-profit sector within the Asian Pacific American community, but in which field (mental health, education, youth, families, etc), I don’t know yet. I feel as if all issues are equally important, but I definitely have to decide where I want to be.
In addition to school, I’ve taken up quite a few roles.
- I’m a mentor for a 6th grader at one of the local elementary schools. She makes me feel old yet nostalgic all at once and I’m happy to see her so vibrant as she is.
- I’m also a co-director for Perspectives, a huge multicultural showcase that the student government puts on every year.
- I’ve also been accepted as one of the 20 pageant contestants for the Miss Vietnam Norcal – Intercollegiate.
- I’m training to be a student-to-student peer counselor where I’d essentially be able to help my fellow peers, students, with their issues ranging from school to relationships to work or whatever their needs are.
And surprisingly enough, I still feel as if I can do more, but when I look at my calendar, I know that I can’t afford to do so. But I’m excited to make this the best year that I have and can’t wait to see how everything turns out.
Miss all of you and I wish I were keeping up better in all of your lives. ♥
Popularity: 1% [?]
Happy Saint Day to Maria Bertilla Boscardin!
This is what happens when you sleep more in an entire weekend than you would during a normal week… even after combining all the days of the week. You come up with weird analogies and have weird dreams. But I’m really here to talk about the former rather than the latter anyway.
So I’m preparing for my braces and whatnot (I know, a little late in life, but better late than never?) and since I have more teeth than my mouth is able to hold, I am forced to extract some teeth (no, this doesn’t include the wisdom teeth I had previously removed). Through all the sleeping and being drugged up this weekend, I realized that this whole process of extraction and the moving of my teeth is a lot like losing someone you love.
Hear me out: You pull out a tooth (or two… or in my case, four) and it hurts like a bitch. It leaves a weird hole in your mouth, a hole that you never had before (minus the ones from your childhood years). And after you’ve gotten the tooth pulled out, it hurts, a lot. It hurts so much that all you want to do is be drugged up for days until the pain subsides or is entirely gone. Even when the pain is gone, you’ve still got that big gap in your mouth. And then the braces start to work. They start pulling the surrounding teeth to fill up the hole. Years later, after the whole process is done, you barely notice that you once had teeth there.
Sound a little familiar? Whether it’s the loss of a friend, a family member, or someone you once loved, you always feel emptier. The pain hurts for days, even for weeks or months and all you want to do (or most people anyway) is erase the pain; make it go away. Eventually, everything else in your life starts to fill in that gap, makes you feel as if you were whole again. Sure, you’ll never be able to replace that hole, or fill it up with something you once had, but with time, you forget that you had lost something so precious to you.
Now, this isn’t typical of every relationship, every friendship, or every bond, but it felt awfully similar. Just be glad I left all the bloody and more painful details out.
Popularity: 22% [?]
Are people really “bad” people? Technically, “bad” is a subjective term, no? For example, conservatives tend to see pre-marital sex as “bad” whereas liberals don’t always see it the same way.
I was thinking about this when a friend, MJ, mentioned that this girl, SS, wasn’t a “bad” girl. I found it a little odd to say, but I understood what she meant. See, to me, SS can be labeled as “bad” when comparing her to the social norms, but thinking about it, I don’t really hate her. Instead, MJ and I decided that SS had too many habits that clashed with our ability to be friends.
Back to the question though, are people really “bad” people? Especially if we compare them to our personal beliefs and values? If we put our personal morals aside, what would define a “bad” person? In a way, it’s all relative depending on the culture and social norms. Are there any universal norms which we can use as a base for this definition?
On a more personal level, when do you feel as if you’re a “bad” person? Does it depend on someone’s reaction and interaction with you? Or does it depend on something else? When did you feel your worst?
(more…)
Popularity: 45% [?]
RSS Feed